This app can make that break up just a little less messy
There is absolutely nothing worse than running into the other half of a worn out, messy or psychotic break up when you least expect it. However, never fear, technology has yet again come through for us. We already have apps that can monitor our sleeping patterns, apps that can give us a window into old age by manipulating our photographs, and apps that show us what our words would sound like through the mouth of a cartoon cat. Now, we can even track our exes in order to ensure that we don’t run into them, avoiding whatever tears, comfort eating or stress rashes that could have been caused by even the most awkward encounter.
Split, is a new ‘anti-social’ application that taps into social networks and allows you to monitor whether or not selected individuals are nearby. Split is founded by Udi Dagan, currently the CEO of Loolyan a man after my own heart who obviously, like myself, has within him some degree of bitterness. The app is backed by $1 million in seed funding, including an investment from entrepreneur Chris Burch.
First, you sync the app with either your Instagram account, Facebook, Foursquare, or all three, and search for the people that you want to avoid by their usernames. You don’t have to be Facebook friends with them or follow them, which is good, because the likelihood is, you probably won’t be or don’t. The app then scans and tells you if they’ve checked in nearby, and alerts you throughout the day if their position changes. If they are within the area, the app shows you a possible escape route to ease your blind panic. It even tells you where they’ve been recently, just so you can shit yourself with relief because you were in the screen next to them in the cinema while they were on a date with someone else.
Some may feel that the application may have a slightly creepy element to it. However there are a number of things that I believe must be considered. First of all, the application taps in to the selected person’s social networking page, but only lets you know where they are if they have posted a status, for example, that allows you to see their location anyway.
If they didn’t want you to know they were chewing on a burger in the Weatherspoon’s down the street, they probably should have taken a photo of it to put on their Instagram, and checked in on Facebook. Thus you can ensure that you don’t have to see their smug cheese covered face when you’re out for a pint with your friends, without the need to endure checking their Facebook and accidently pressing down too hard and liking a photo.
Second, consider the possibilities of said application for other motives besides avoiding exes. Imagine how useful this application would be in a Ferris Bueller type scenario for pulling a sickie and dodging to town to buy junk food supplies for your relentless film-athon whilst keeping track of exactly where everybody you work with is at that current time. For less rebellious ventures, you could simply make sure that you don’t run into someone that pisses you off, could talk the back legs off a donkey, has body odour, or has some one of those incredibly contagious gastric bugs.
Overall, I believe that anything we can do to avoid unnecessary awkward encounters should be embraced – here’s hoping that the next upgrade will have the ability to trip the avoided people over.